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|  | Guy parks for free « Thread Started on Oct 9, 2006, 8:33pm » | |
Frugality snares Glodis - Trying to save $15 can be embarrassing Worcester Telegram & Gazette (MA) August 29, 2006 Author: Dianne Williamson
Worcester County Sheriff My Guy Glodis had the entire weekend to produce a semi-plausible excuse for his embarrassing attempt to park at a Cape Cod beach for nothing, which is probably how he came up with this cute answer when I asked why he didn't just pony up the $15 fee like everyone else.
"I guess," he said yesterday, "it's because I'm as frugal with my own money as I am with the taxpayers'."
Ha. Nice try, My Guy. But I fear that the cause of his behavior is symptomatic of a condition far more serious than frugality.
My Guy, alas, has been struck by the Sheriff of Nottingham Syndrome (SONS), a highly contagious and progressive disease that afflicts members of the Worcester County Sheriff's Department and is characterized by an uncontrollable urge to be treated differently from everybody else.
I am not, technically, a licensed physician, but I've witnessed the ravages of SONS enough to know it when I see it. Its symptoms include, but are not limited to, delusions of grandeur, arrogance, excessive badge-flashing, an unwarranted desire for special treatment, an aversion to paying even the smallest fees or following the most basic laws, and blatant but highly entertaining fibbing when caught exhibiting bad behavior.
Sadly, there is no cure.
The disease has been active for decades, but the first documented outbreak of SONS occurred in 1998, when Lt. Stephen Ceely was arrested after he inexplicably drove his car onto a sidewalk outside a Salisbury strip club and refused to move it after informing police that he was a Worcester County sheriff.
"I don't care if you're the sheriff of Nottingham," the cop responded. "Move the car."
Hence SONS, which also afflicted a handful of rowdy sheriff's employees in 2003, when they were arrested for causing a ruckus at a Chinese restaurant in Auburn that began when a sergeant walked behind the bar and helped himself to an expensive bottle of Pernod (See related SONS complication: Alcohol Entitlement Syndrome).
We prayed that we had seen the last of the disease when former Sheriff John M. Flynn, long known to be an active carrier of SONS, lost his re-election bid to Guy W. Glodis, who promised all sorts of reforms and has actually followed through on some. But poor My Guy has shown to be highly susceptible to SONS, likely as a result of environmental factors at the jail.
As first reported Friday by Boston Herald columnist Howie Carr - not that I am bitter - My Guy and his family had gone to Corporation Beach in Dennis Aug. 13 and was told by the young girl manning the booth that it cost $15 to park. At that point, according to a report later filed by Dennis police, My Guy flashed his badge and told her he worked for the state. The girl, apparently unfamiliar with the symptoms of SONS, repeated that the parking fee was $15.
According to the police report, My Guy then responded, "I don't mean to be rude, but I'm not parking. I work for the state." He then drove into the parking lot, parked, went to the beach and was slapped with a $50 ticket after police on routine patrol were informed that a driver had parked without paying.
Yesterday, My Guy firmly denied flashing his badge to the attendant (see SONS symptoms: Highly Entertaining Fibbing), but admitted that he "made a mistake" and paid the ticket "like anyone else." He did acknowledge that he told the attendant he was driving a state vehicle and that the attendant "shrugged" when he said he wasn't going to park.
"I wish I could make it juicier for you," claimed My Guy, who earns upward of $100,000 a year. "I was wrong. There's no spin to it."
Then, he spinned, he arrived at the beach with his wife and two kids "at the end of the day" and was just going to grab a quick hot dog at the concession stand, although the police report notes that he got to the beach at 2 p.m. and stayed until at least 3:34 p.m., so it must have been a foot-long. When he returned to his humongous state-owned Ford Expedition, he found the ticket.
"And rightfully so," My Guy said. When it was noted that the police report says he flashed his badge, he said, "It's puzzling how a police officer not at the incident could write an accurate report without even talking to me."
Yesterday, Dennis Police Capt. William Monahan said police had no reason to doubt the version of the attendant, as My Guy did indeed park without paying.
"He showed his badge and said he worked for the state, which indicated to me at the least that he was claiming to be an officer of the state police," Capt. Monahan said. "He indicated he wasn't going to park, but then he parked and headed in the direction of the beach."
The captain added, "He doesn't have the right to park for free. He's not even the sheriff of Barnstable County."
Would he be allowed to park for free?
"I don't think the sheriff of Barnstable County would attempt to park for free," the captain said.
So SONS is apparently confined to Worcester County, where the only known treatment is exposure to public ridicule, although the prognosis doesn't appear to be good. Nor does My Guy's claim of frugality make much sense under the circumstances.
"We don't get many complaints about people avoiding the beach fee," said Capt. Monahan. "It was much more expensive to do it his way."
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